What is happening?

 I know I don't post very often but after reading the changes proposed for DLA and being linked to One month before heartbreak I felt I had to write something and show my support.

I have suffered from mental health problems for as long as I can remember and it is a huge battle for me to even get dressed in the morning or feed myself. I have had many jobs working in a wide range of professions, got good GCSEs, qualifications in art, hairdressing and science and I even tried to study biology at university but failed due to ill health. I have done my best and tried really hard to be a successful member of society but with my rapid mood swings, depression and anxiety I find it very difficult to hold down a job for very long and become unreliable and unfortunately that is not what employers want.

I have been claiming ESA up until a few weeks ago, I had a medical exam and although I was completely truthful about my problems and told them things that I don't even like to admit to myself I scored 0 points and so was denied. I am now in the process of appealing which is incredibly stressful. I tried to claim DLA back in September but they denied my claim without even seeing me or waiting for my doctor to reply to their letter. I would have appealed but the stress was too much, I couldn't go through with it.

It is a struggle for me and my partner to live on just ESA, especially now we are on the reduced rate, we are lucky that we have friends and family who can help us if we get really stuck, although we feel incredibly guilty asking as they shouldn't have to pay for us. I can only imagine what it is like for people who do not have that support, for people who rely on DLA for basic living. If the proposed plans go through thousands of disabled people will suffer and some will almost certainly die. Many people will have to go into residential living and although many of them are good and have staff who care we have all heard horror stories about people who have been mistreated. Many mental health services are being cut back already and if people loose their DLA as well as the vital services to help them cope day to day I can see a lot of suicides being reported in the future.

We must fight, we must be heard! Even if this does not directly affect you just think, many illnesses and disabilities come about through accidents, this might not affect you now but it might in the future.    

Been away for a while

Not been on here in ages. Had a lot of stuff going on and been to stressed to make mt brain work.

I had an interview for my ESA two weeks ago and I'll find out soon if they have failed me again. I'm suppose to get money through today so will have to check my account in a bit. I just know that the aresholes will stop it again and I will have to have another tribunal.

In other news I am giving up on the NHS, they have messed me about too many times and I'm sick of it. I have contacted a few private mental health professionals to see if I can get my assessment done. One person has got back to me and we are going to try and sort out an appointment some time in Jan.

Thursday 9/9/10

Today I have been going a bit crazy. I'm still really confused by my diagnosis and I'm not getting any answers. I was told I would get a letter outlining my condition some time this week and it still hasn't arrived, I also went to my doctors to see if they had heard anything but they hadn't. I really hate not having clear cut answers and I have been doing lots of research online but it is all so confusing. I think I'm becoming obsessed.

Wednesday 8/9/10

 Went to college today for some stupid thing for induction. I couldn't be bothered with it coz I knew everything anyway coz I have been there before but they said it was compulsory :(. We had to go round different stalls and ask questions about security and what help we can get so we could fill in some stupid questionnaire, it was so boring.

I went to Argos before to get a new bed. I was hoping I could get it that day and just get an estate taxi back but it has to be delivered. It says on the receipt that it could take up to 28 days, what's that about, what about people who are sleeping on the floor coz they don't have one. There should be some sort of priority service for things like beds coz they are essentials.

I wanted to try and get some kip before coz I was finally feeling relaxed but the woman upstairs was moving furniture around or something again and I got to frustrated so had to get up again. She annoys me so much.

I need to take my tablet soon but I can only take pills with food and I had a burger and chips before so I'm not hungry, bum.